Well hello there you. Don't be ashamed! Come a bit closer! Not that close... Don't make it awkward now.

GOLDEN RULES
1. Online gaming is serious business
2. Noobs are scum
3. If a feature in a game is popular/effective, it's overpowered and ♥♥♥♥
4. If anything kills you, it's overpowered and ♥♥♥♥
5. If you're losing, it's because of lag
6. If you're losing badly, it's because they're hacking
7. Everyone is a noob
8. Singing over the mic is awesome
9. Insult everyone's mother
10. Team members who score are killstealers

THEORY OF GAME CRITIQUE
1. If it's a sequel/remake, it's always inferior to the original, regardless of the actual quality of the game
2. If a game is extremely popular, then the game is merely overhyped, and is not actually good
3. If a game uses the same formula as its predecessor, it's unoriginal and stale
4. If a game uses a different formula from its predecessor, it's out of touch with their roots and should be more like the original
5. If it's a kickstarter game being produced by a veteran game developer, it's always a high quality game, even if it falls under the circumstances of rule 3