Our father, who art in gold, Wario be thy name.

As your pope, it has recently come to my attention that a certain Valve video-game, commonly known as 'Defense Fort 2', has added the red hat of an opposing religion to ours, Marioism.

I utterly detest this decision of theirs, as I know many of you do, but this could be an opportunity to spread the word of Wariosim.
This is our chance to spread the word of Warioism. Taint the hat in yellow paint and spread the word of our church and our mission. This is our big chance.

Remember to spread the word by inviting your fellow friends and work colleagues, and it is also reminded that you should be praying for Wario every day.

Amen.